December 4, 2006

Girlscouts Vs. Boyscouts

Is there any debate here? Girlscouts beat Boyscouts hands down. And it’s on the basis on one thing. The COOKIE. Because I was a boyscout for like six months. And let me tell you, in that brief period of time we had to sell:

–Christmas wreaths
–unpopped popcorn(the kernels I’d guess you’d say)
–Turkeys(who buys their turkey from a boyscout troop?)
–Candy with nuts(Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t. Most of the time? People don’t.)

We also had clothing drives. And picking up trash. And helping out at church. And you know what we never had? Cookies. The best we sold was donuts on Sundays after mass. Krispy Kreme. But did any of it compare to the wonder that is the Samoa? No. Not it does not. The Samoa is the platonic ideal of Cookie. It’s the closet thing we mortals have to perfection. So Boyscouts of the world? I say to you: get to work on something as valuable as The Cookie or else you are never ever going to be as successful as GSA. You’re getting beat right out of the gate. Out of the stable really.

(Although I will say this, I did learn Egyptian Ratscrew in Boyscouts and that was definitely something cool. And I learned to insult another boy by calling him a “greenhorn”. I find it refreshing that we boyscouts were innocent enough to use that as the worst thing you could call someone.)


  1. Voot Oreenie

    Hey Nate- you sneaky bastard oralizing all over the internet like this and not letting me know.

  2. Nate

    who are you voot oreenie??

  3. zack

    boy scouts sell diffrent things depending on the troop an how much money they need girls scouts sounds a lot more easy than boyscouts

  4. GirlScoutinGirl

    THANKYOU!!!! I’m mean seriously how can you even think for a moment that girl scout would take second place next to boy scouts!

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