I once pitched an idea for a fake show called Project Runaway where you had to pick the best Runaway. But this isn’t about that. This is about the new season of Project Runway and how they’ve totally gone overboard on these people. The new crazy is Suede. Suede is a Saturday Night Live version of a Project Runway contestant but he’s real. He’s bi-sexual and with crazy hair, fake blue faux-hawk, refers to himself in the 3rd person, and likes to make catty, impish comments.
In short, he’s destined to win. But he’s annoying as all get out. If you thought Christian from last year was bad, prepare for Suede. But there’s not just Suede. There’s Blayne. Blayne likes to declare things ‘licious. Anything can be -licious. Girliscious. Suedeliscious. Timlicious. It doesn’t seem to matter. He also decided Heidi is Darth Vader. Reasoning? Because she’s all shiny and put together and then cuh-razy on the inside.
How does Blayne know Heidi is crazy? Is Heidi crazy? Am I crazy for not knowing this? I don’t think so. And I don’t think Heidi is crazy. I think we know who’s crazy. Blayne is crazy.
But I will keep watching. Because I am addicted.
In other news, I was excited for Kitchen Nightmares. But alas, it was a repeat. Fall TV, I miss you. I will wait for you. I will walk the widow’s walk in anticipation for when you come home and round the bend into the bay that is prime time. I will be faithful. Do not worry. I’ll be true to you.